Jeff
Jeff aka Shift
Sally
Sally aka Precious (with Shift in background)
Sylvia
Sylvia aka Scorpia
Josh aka Merlyn
Monday, August 29, 2011
Random Made-up Story Pictures
The following are some pictures I made using HeroMachine 3.0 on the internet, Enjoy!
Random Made-Up Story Part 5
The following Random Made-up Story series is not finished, but something I wrote to occupy me while making deliveries at my old job. Feel free to comment and critique, just know that they aren't complete and may never be complete. But I do plan on continuing the series at some point.
Thanks and have fun!
Part Five
It is amazing how much can happen when you have the power to alter all of reality. Especially the ability to slow or stop time. With but a thought I literally could feel my awareness take a step away from reality and as time slowed I could think through all that I planned and come up with so many ways of doing things that I soon had to stop and just pick one.
Calmly, I looked over my friends and calculated their actions, should they be put through any of the scenarios I came up with. Then I read their bodies and emotions and found the best course for them.
Now I’m not saying that I know better than they what they should and shouldn’t do, but if I’m going to alter reality I have to come up with something that makes the least amount of alterations for the rest of the world. If watching TV and movies has taught me anything is that the most aggressive and complicated changes in a persons reality can come unraveled as their mind cannot adjust to so much so quickly.
So, baby steps. First alter the memories of their families and friends. Especially those that were at the hospital when we took off. With each step and alteration I could feel the power build as this web I was creating expanded.
Then I had to dive into the virtual world and make some alterations to bank accounts, stored data in government computer systems, passwords, etc. The web of power broke into the physical world in the form of motes of light coalescing into a growing ball of crackling energy.
After that I switched to hard copy stuff and began creating whole reams of paperwork that mentioned or even hinted at any of these new ID’s I was inventing. From paperwork, I went through and revamped all of their clothes so they would fit the new bodies. The energy began sending out tendrils of lightning harmlessly scanning my friends and flowing over them like it was alive.
Almost there. Just one more thing to do. I had already completed all I needed to do for Sally and Sylvia, but now Jeff was going to take a lot of power and effort. For him I was not only creating a career but an established one that actually affected most of the world.
The power built up until I couldn’t hold anymore. Barely holding onto Time while keeping all in check I released my hold at the same moment as I slammed my hands together! With a burst reminiscent of when the Death Star exploded a wave of multi-colored energy surged outward passing through the air and anything else in its path. As it swept at near-light speed around the globe my friends just gawked at me. Just as I released the light I had allowed them to see what I was doing.
For almost exactly one minute they stood there as their memories and experiences adjusted to their new lives. They would always remember their past lives, but no one else would.
Before any of them could say anything I snapped my fingers and sent them home…at least to their new homes. Lives had been changed and I felt drained. It was time to get some rest and then…and then I will begin to try and make sure that I won’t become a villain.
Without a glance back I turned and started walking. The world warped around me as I stepped from 2010 onto the unblemished tropical forest floor of 4001 B.C..
Thanks and have fun!
Part Five
It is amazing how much can happen when you have the power to alter all of reality. Especially the ability to slow or stop time. With but a thought I literally could feel my awareness take a step away from reality and as time slowed I could think through all that I planned and come up with so many ways of doing things that I soon had to stop and just pick one.
Calmly, I looked over my friends and calculated their actions, should they be put through any of the scenarios I came up with. Then I read their bodies and emotions and found the best course for them.
Now I’m not saying that I know better than they what they should and shouldn’t do, but if I’m going to alter reality I have to come up with something that makes the least amount of alterations for the rest of the world. If watching TV and movies has taught me anything is that the most aggressive and complicated changes in a persons reality can come unraveled as their mind cannot adjust to so much so quickly.
So, baby steps. First alter the memories of their families and friends. Especially those that were at the hospital when we took off. With each step and alteration I could feel the power build as this web I was creating expanded.
Then I had to dive into the virtual world and make some alterations to bank accounts, stored data in government computer systems, passwords, etc. The web of power broke into the physical world in the form of motes of light coalescing into a growing ball of crackling energy.
After that I switched to hard copy stuff and began creating whole reams of paperwork that mentioned or even hinted at any of these new ID’s I was inventing. From paperwork, I went through and revamped all of their clothes so they would fit the new bodies. The energy began sending out tendrils of lightning harmlessly scanning my friends and flowing over them like it was alive.
Almost there. Just one more thing to do. I had already completed all I needed to do for Sally and Sylvia, but now Jeff was going to take a lot of power and effort. For him I was not only creating a career but an established one that actually affected most of the world.
The power built up until I couldn’t hold anymore. Barely holding onto Time while keeping all in check I released my hold at the same moment as I slammed my hands together! With a burst reminiscent of when the Death Star exploded a wave of multi-colored energy surged outward passing through the air and anything else in its path. As it swept at near-light speed around the globe my friends just gawked at me. Just as I released the light I had allowed them to see what I was doing.
For almost exactly one minute they stood there as their memories and experiences adjusted to their new lives. They would always remember their past lives, but no one else would.
Before any of them could say anything I snapped my fingers and sent them home…at least to their new homes. Lives had been changed and I felt drained. It was time to get some rest and then…and then I will begin to try and make sure that I won’t become a villain.
Without a glance back I turned and started walking. The world warped around me as I stepped from 2010 onto the unblemished tropical forest floor of 4001 B.C..
Random Made-up Story Part 4
The following Random Made-up Story series is not finished, but something I wrote to occupy me while making deliveries at my old job. Feel free to comment and critique, just know that they aren't complete and may never be complete. But I do plan on continuing the series at some point.
Thanks and have fun!
Part Four
Back to Joshua
Time didn’t exist.
I seemed to be standing between moments.
I could look around and doing so brought the others into focus.
In my left hand I held Sally’s hand and I seemed to be able to read her every emotion and thought.
It was like her mind was being downloaded into my head. I had to shake my head in order to get the process to stop.
Her fear of the situation, her concern over what was happening to her, her desperate longing that it was real and that she wasn’t about to wake up and cry because it was all a dream.
The download started again causing me to look away to break it.
To my right I was holding hands with Sylvia as well. Wait a minute! She was holding my left hand! Before I could ponder this I felt something else. I was holding someone else. A third left hand had grabbed hold of someone and brought them along to this…moment? This transition seemed to be lasting quite a long time, but as far the others were concerned this was going to be instantaneous.
But where was I taking us? Oh yes, and then we were there! Standing in an nearly empty gated parking lot at our workplace. The light faded and all four of us were standing in the warm afternoon sunlight.
Four? Oh that’s right that other person. Apparently when I reached to snatch the girls and myself away I had been thinking of everyone in the truck.
“Uhm, yeah, what just happened?” Jeff was looking at all of us hoping for an answer. It seems that my new powers also caused my thoughts to grab everyone in the truck whether I knew they were there or not. Just looking at him I knew why he was there and how he had been hiding in the truck unexpectantly joining us in our lightning upgrade.
“Jeff? Oh my god, Jeff! I totally forgot! I’m so sorry!” Sylvia apologized. The memory of the prank they had planned flooded her mind.
“Is okay, I’m good, but how did we get here and why do you all look different?” Jeff glanced at me as both Sylvia and Sally looked at me. Interesting that he actually had no ill feelings for Sylvia about being forgotten.
“Yeah, that would be me. It seems I grabbed us and transported us to here.” I gestured at the parking lot and lost my hold on my thoughts. Suddenly I could hear all three of them and then more. I could feel what they felt and everything they could now do was brought completely into my mind.
“Stop!” I cried and grabbed my head. Staring down at the ground I concentrated on concrete and asphalt. I knew that they were worried but also scared and confused at my outburst. I knew that as easily as I knew the chemical composition of the spot I was staring at.
Sally stepped up to me and put her hand on my back. It startled me despite my watching her mind come to the decision to make that move.
“Josh, are you okay? What can we do?” She was always concerned for others.
I answered her question but not the one she spoke outloud. “All that you can do, and all that you are, I’m sorry, but I somehow have…copied it all into my head. I can show you what your new abilities are and how to use them properly, but…” I had to stop because the idea in my head was going to be very difficult.
“You can train us?” Sylvia was excited about learning more. Jeff nodded as also was eager. Only Sally seemed hesitant.
“Yes, I can train you..” before I could finish the sentence Sally sighed with relief. I looked at her and smiled. “No, Sally, it’s not a dream. This is real and you will never look like…well, your old self again.”
“Really?” She smiled. “That’s good.” She grimaced. “I don’t want to be like that ever again.”
“Me either!” Sylvia agreed.
“Yeah, me too.” Jeff nodded and smiled.
“Shut up, Jeff! You were skinny already and now your buff!” Sylvia playfully snapped at him.
“Yes, he was but now he’s anything he wants to be.” I stepped in. My thoughts were again my own and it seemed that as long as I thought of others as websites I can access but choose not to, then I was able to have a little quiet in my head.
“All of you have been changed on a genetic level. You can and maybe even will, pass on your gifts to your children.” I began.
Sylvia interrupted. “Bummer, I can’t have anymore children.”
“Yeah, what about me? I don’t want to have anymore kids!” Sally added.
I smiled sadly. “Actually, Sylvia, you can now. Your body is in perfect working form, as is Sally’s.” I glance at them both. “In fact because of your new…attributes I’m afraid that even the Pill won’t be able to stop anything.” I sigh. “I could change that, I think, but I’m not going to.”
Sally: “What?”
Sylvia: “Why not?”
Jeff: “Yeah.”
I tapped my head. “Think about it! I didn’t do this to us! It was a bolt of lightning! In my mind it has to be a God-thing! And you want me to change what God did to you? I’m sorry but I don’t want another bolt of lightning to zap me and take this all away! No thank you!” I shake my head. “Sorry, folks, but we’re going to have to learn to live our lives with these new additions.”
“Are we going to form a team? Like in the comics?” Jeff was all smiles.
Sylvia looks at Sally and they both shrug.
Sylvia: “Sure.”
Sally: “Yeah, okay.”
Jeff: “Yes!” Slowly Jeff’s arms stretched out and began to circle us. “Come on, group hug!”
Sylvia reached for Sally who cringed from the touch of Jeff’s arm resting across her shoulders.
With a thought I let the arms constrict through me leaving me outside of the circle.
They all stop moving and look at me.
“I’m sorry. But I can’t.” I bowed my head and then look up slowly.
Sylvia: “Why not?”
Sally: “What’s the matter?”
I inhale deeply and try very hard to not force them to understand my thoughts. “I have these amazing abilities that I’ve always wanted, but now that I have them I realize that I really need to be very careful with them. I need to step away and practice and get used to things before I can be around others. I need to make sure that who and what they are is not because I altered them to be that way.”
Jeff: “What do ya mean?”
Sylvia: “Yeah, I thought that’s what we all were going to do? Practice and learn how to use our powers?”
“Yes, you will, but I know that I can also just force the information into your head and at the same time I can literally force you to do anything I want you to.” Please, please understand! I thought.
Sally: “You can?”
Guess they won’t really understand unless I show them. I turn my whole body to fully face Sally. She suddenly straightened upright and turned to walk towards the nearest parked car. With a glance at Jeff, I cause him to put a little distance between us.
Sylvia: “Where’s he going?”
“Just watch.” I say.
Once Sally reached the nearest car, she quickly and effortlessly grabbed the front fender and picked the mustang up, holding it like a bat. With a twist she turned and threw the car straight at Jeff.
Sylvia: “No, Jeff!”
Jeff just stood there as I planned and the vehicle slammed into him! Jeff and the mustang sailed across the lot and plowed into the wall. Car parts and concrete chips flew out as the vehicle inmbedded itself with Jeff between it and the wall.
I let go of my control of Sally, while at the same time covering her in an emotional aura of calmness and acceptance. I made her see that what I made her do to Jeff was going to be okay.
Sylvia literally flew towards the smashed vehicle and began trying to pull the car out of the wall all the while calling for help and Jeff’s name.
“Here, let me.” I call to her and with a motion I rip the car out and send it sailing through the air to where Sally had grabbed it. As it went it began self-repairs and by the time I set it down it looked like it had never been touched.
Jeff, on the other hand, was truthfully spread across the wall. I had to stop myself from laughing as he looked like a Van Gogh painting was painfully redone by a child using play-doh. Nothing was in the right spot.
Sylvia started to reach for him. “No.” I said. “Let him come back on his own.” The three of us just stared up at Jeff waiting to see what would happen next.
Slowly, Jeff’s body began to merge and slide down the wall onto the ground. At first becoming a puddle and then starting to grow. First a head with eyeballs but no mouth or nose. Then a torso and arms that were way too long. Finally one leg and then another appeared and the entire mass began to harden and coalesce into a perfectly formed Jeff Kimbro.
“Aaahhh!!” he yelled. “Why did you do that?” he glared at Sally.
Sally raised her hands but I answered. “She didn’t. I did. You see, I can not only read your every thought and emotion but I can also control them. So, before I get out of control and unable to stop, I need to spend some time away in order to better understand my limits and how to restrain myself.”
Sally: “So, you’re leaving us?”
I nodded. “Yes, for a bit.” Then I smiled. “But for you barely any time will have passed. It seems I can also travel and/or control time so while I may be gone quite a while in my opinion, for you it may seem like minutes!”
I looked at them all. “But before I go there are a few things I’m going to do to help you out.”
Jeff: “Yeah, like what?” I could tell he didn’t trust me to much right now. But that was understandable.
“First I’m going to give you all your super identity costumes. Then I’m going to download into your head the knowledge of all that you can do. But you are going to have to practice in order to get used to how they work.”
Sylvia: “That’s cool with me. I’m looking forward to this!”
Sally, smiling: “Okay.”
Jeff, cautious: “What else?”
“Then,” I smile, “then I’m going to make sure that your bank accounts never lack for money ever again!” Now they’re all happy. “Also, in order to make sure your new bodies are not a surprise for your families, and if I can figure the best way of doing it, I’m going to try and make it so that anyone who has seen you in the last 6 months knows that you have been working out and losing, or in Jeff’s case, gaining weight.”
Jeff: "Yeah, how did that happen?”
“Jeff, when you were struck by lightning you were inside a cart full of orders for the inmates. But when they found you, you were lying on the floor and not in a cart. The bolt of lightning merged you and the orders and the cart into one giving you enough mass to be able to do the things you are going to be able to do.”
Sally: “Do you know what we can do?”
“Yes,” I replied, “I do. Let me show you.”
End Part Four
Thanks and have fun!
Part Four
Back to Joshua
Time didn’t exist.
I seemed to be standing between moments.
I could look around and doing so brought the others into focus.
In my left hand I held Sally’s hand and I seemed to be able to read her every emotion and thought.
It was like her mind was being downloaded into my head. I had to shake my head in order to get the process to stop.
Her fear of the situation, her concern over what was happening to her, her desperate longing that it was real and that she wasn’t about to wake up and cry because it was all a dream.
The download started again causing me to look away to break it.
To my right I was holding hands with Sylvia as well. Wait a minute! She was holding my left hand! Before I could ponder this I felt something else. I was holding someone else. A third left hand had grabbed hold of someone and brought them along to this…moment? This transition seemed to be lasting quite a long time, but as far the others were concerned this was going to be instantaneous.
But where was I taking us? Oh yes, and then we were there! Standing in an nearly empty gated parking lot at our workplace. The light faded and all four of us were standing in the warm afternoon sunlight.
Four? Oh that’s right that other person. Apparently when I reached to snatch the girls and myself away I had been thinking of everyone in the truck.
“Uhm, yeah, what just happened?” Jeff was looking at all of us hoping for an answer. It seems that my new powers also caused my thoughts to grab everyone in the truck whether I knew they were there or not. Just looking at him I knew why he was there and how he had been hiding in the truck unexpectantly joining us in our lightning upgrade.
“Jeff? Oh my god, Jeff! I totally forgot! I’m so sorry!” Sylvia apologized. The memory of the prank they had planned flooded her mind.
“Is okay, I’m good, but how did we get here and why do you all look different?” Jeff glanced at me as both Sylvia and Sally looked at me. Interesting that he actually had no ill feelings for Sylvia about being forgotten.
“Yeah, that would be me. It seems I grabbed us and transported us to here.” I gestured at the parking lot and lost my hold on my thoughts. Suddenly I could hear all three of them and then more. I could feel what they felt and everything they could now do was brought completely into my mind.
“Stop!” I cried and grabbed my head. Staring down at the ground I concentrated on concrete and asphalt. I knew that they were worried but also scared and confused at my outburst. I knew that as easily as I knew the chemical composition of the spot I was staring at.
Sally stepped up to me and put her hand on my back. It startled me despite my watching her mind come to the decision to make that move.
“Josh, are you okay? What can we do?” She was always concerned for others.
I answered her question but not the one she spoke outloud. “All that you can do, and all that you are, I’m sorry, but I somehow have…copied it all into my head. I can show you what your new abilities are and how to use them properly, but…” I had to stop because the idea in my head was going to be very difficult.
“You can train us?” Sylvia was excited about learning more. Jeff nodded as also was eager. Only Sally seemed hesitant.
“Yes, I can train you..” before I could finish the sentence Sally sighed with relief. I looked at her and smiled. “No, Sally, it’s not a dream. This is real and you will never look like…well, your old self again.”
“Really?” She smiled. “That’s good.” She grimaced. “I don’t want to be like that ever again.”
“Me either!” Sylvia agreed.
“Yeah, me too.” Jeff nodded and smiled.
“Shut up, Jeff! You were skinny already and now your buff!” Sylvia playfully snapped at him.
“Yes, he was but now he’s anything he wants to be.” I stepped in. My thoughts were again my own and it seemed that as long as I thought of others as websites I can access but choose not to, then I was able to have a little quiet in my head.
“All of you have been changed on a genetic level. You can and maybe even will, pass on your gifts to your children.” I began.
Sylvia interrupted. “Bummer, I can’t have anymore children.”
“Yeah, what about me? I don’t want to have anymore kids!” Sally added.
I smiled sadly. “Actually, Sylvia, you can now. Your body is in perfect working form, as is Sally’s.” I glance at them both. “In fact because of your new…attributes I’m afraid that even the Pill won’t be able to stop anything.” I sigh. “I could change that, I think, but I’m not going to.”
Sally: “What?”
Sylvia: “Why not?”
Jeff: “Yeah.”
I tapped my head. “Think about it! I didn’t do this to us! It was a bolt of lightning! In my mind it has to be a God-thing! And you want me to change what God did to you? I’m sorry but I don’t want another bolt of lightning to zap me and take this all away! No thank you!” I shake my head. “Sorry, folks, but we’re going to have to learn to live our lives with these new additions.”
“Are we going to form a team? Like in the comics?” Jeff was all smiles.
Sylvia looks at Sally and they both shrug.
Sylvia: “Sure.”
Sally: “Yeah, okay.”
Jeff: “Yes!” Slowly Jeff’s arms stretched out and began to circle us. “Come on, group hug!”
Sylvia reached for Sally who cringed from the touch of Jeff’s arm resting across her shoulders.
With a thought I let the arms constrict through me leaving me outside of the circle.
They all stop moving and look at me.
“I’m sorry. But I can’t.” I bowed my head and then look up slowly.
Sylvia: “Why not?”
Sally: “What’s the matter?”
I inhale deeply and try very hard to not force them to understand my thoughts. “I have these amazing abilities that I’ve always wanted, but now that I have them I realize that I really need to be very careful with them. I need to step away and practice and get used to things before I can be around others. I need to make sure that who and what they are is not because I altered them to be that way.”
Jeff: “What do ya mean?”
Sylvia: “Yeah, I thought that’s what we all were going to do? Practice and learn how to use our powers?”
“Yes, you will, but I know that I can also just force the information into your head and at the same time I can literally force you to do anything I want you to.” Please, please understand! I thought.
Sally: “You can?”
Guess they won’t really understand unless I show them. I turn my whole body to fully face Sally. She suddenly straightened upright and turned to walk towards the nearest parked car. With a glance at Jeff, I cause him to put a little distance between us.
Sylvia: “Where’s he going?”
“Just watch.” I say.
Once Sally reached the nearest car, she quickly and effortlessly grabbed the front fender and picked the mustang up, holding it like a bat. With a twist she turned and threw the car straight at Jeff.
Sylvia: “No, Jeff!”
Jeff just stood there as I planned and the vehicle slammed into him! Jeff and the mustang sailed across the lot and plowed into the wall. Car parts and concrete chips flew out as the vehicle inmbedded itself with Jeff between it and the wall.
I let go of my control of Sally, while at the same time covering her in an emotional aura of calmness and acceptance. I made her see that what I made her do to Jeff was going to be okay.
Sylvia literally flew towards the smashed vehicle and began trying to pull the car out of the wall all the while calling for help and Jeff’s name.
“Here, let me.” I call to her and with a motion I rip the car out and send it sailing through the air to where Sally had grabbed it. As it went it began self-repairs and by the time I set it down it looked like it had never been touched.
Jeff, on the other hand, was truthfully spread across the wall. I had to stop myself from laughing as he looked like a Van Gogh painting was painfully redone by a child using play-doh. Nothing was in the right spot.
Sylvia started to reach for him. “No.” I said. “Let him come back on his own.” The three of us just stared up at Jeff waiting to see what would happen next.
Slowly, Jeff’s body began to merge and slide down the wall onto the ground. At first becoming a puddle and then starting to grow. First a head with eyeballs but no mouth or nose. Then a torso and arms that were way too long. Finally one leg and then another appeared and the entire mass began to harden and coalesce into a perfectly formed Jeff Kimbro.
“Aaahhh!!” he yelled. “Why did you do that?” he glared at Sally.
Sally raised her hands but I answered. “She didn’t. I did. You see, I can not only read your every thought and emotion but I can also control them. So, before I get out of control and unable to stop, I need to spend some time away in order to better understand my limits and how to restrain myself.”
Sally: “So, you’re leaving us?”
I nodded. “Yes, for a bit.” Then I smiled. “But for you barely any time will have passed. It seems I can also travel and/or control time so while I may be gone quite a while in my opinion, for you it may seem like minutes!”
I looked at them all. “But before I go there are a few things I’m going to do to help you out.”
Jeff: “Yeah, like what?” I could tell he didn’t trust me to much right now. But that was understandable.
“First I’m going to give you all your super identity costumes. Then I’m going to download into your head the knowledge of all that you can do. But you are going to have to practice in order to get used to how they work.”
Sylvia: “That’s cool with me. I’m looking forward to this!”
Sally, smiling: “Okay.”
Jeff, cautious: “What else?”
“Then,” I smile, “then I’m going to make sure that your bank accounts never lack for money ever again!” Now they’re all happy. “Also, in order to make sure your new bodies are not a surprise for your families, and if I can figure the best way of doing it, I’m going to try and make it so that anyone who has seen you in the last 6 months knows that you have been working out and losing, or in Jeff’s case, gaining weight.”
Jeff: "Yeah, how did that happen?”
“Jeff, when you were struck by lightning you were inside a cart full of orders for the inmates. But when they found you, you were lying on the floor and not in a cart. The bolt of lightning merged you and the orders and the cart into one giving you enough mass to be able to do the things you are going to be able to do.”
Sally: “Do you know what we can do?”
“Yes,” I replied, “I do. Let me show you.”
End Part Four
Random Made-up Story Part 3
The following Random Made-up Story series is not finished, but something I wrote to occupy me while making deliveries at my old job. Feel free to comment and critique, just know that they aren't complete and may never be complete. But I do plan on continuing the series at some point.
Thanks and have fun!
Part Three – Jeff’s Side of the Situation
Oh, this did not turn out right.
I looked around and wondered if maybe I should have rethought my actions.
I was sitting in a very uncomfortable chair, handcuffed. Yes, handcuffed. A police officer stood on either side of me as I the doctor questioned me. He stops to stare at me and I realize he asked me a question.
“Huh?” Not my brightest moment.
The doctor looks tired and upset. “I asked you if you know why you are still alive? You just suffered a tremendous amount of electricity coursing through your body and the only thing wrong with you is that you gained a massive amount of weight. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the others in the truck lost weight so I think that you might know what happened!”
I shook my head, “Uhm, nope.”
Taking off his glasses the doctor rubs his eyes. “Tell us again how you managed to be in the back of the truck where passengers are not allowed to ride.”
Oops, now they ask the one question that’s going to get me fired. “Uhm, yeah, see…ah man where do I begin?” Shaking my head I plunge in.
“Okay, see, I was supposed to be working back at the warehouse but I helped load the carts into the truck. Sylvia, the one I was helping, joked around and told me to climb into one of the carts. She thought it would be funny to try and scare Josh. Uhm he’s my friend and he was going to drive. Yeah, so I climbed in and after driving for a bit I was supposed to start pounding on the wall and screaming for help. Hehe.” I started smiling and laughing but one look told me no one else thought it was funny. Man, I’m so busted.
“Anyways, I guess they forgot about me or couldn’t hear me because I was banging on the wall for a minute and no one stopped. I tried to get out my phone but dropped it when the truck made a sudden turn. I fell back into the cart and was trying to reach the phone when the whole truck just flipped! The next thing I know I’m getting electricuted and I black out.”
Suddenly the doctors pager goes off and some code is called out over the loudspeaker and the doctor goes running with security right behind him. The officer who had been taking notes tells me to stay put and starts heading in the same direction as the doctor.
Rubbing my hands down my pant leg I start to really pray hard. I stop and look down to find that even though I was sitting straight up with my legs sticking straight out in front of me, my hands were playing with my shoe laces. Quickly, I pull them back and sit with my arms crossed for a bit. Looking around I try to see if anyone else caught that. Nope, doesn’t look like it. Should I try it again?
Trying to act casual about it I stretch my legs and arms only to watch my arms and legs match in length and then continue to grow!
Pulling back I start to think about what is happening to me. First I gain almost 300 pounds in a few hours and now I can stretch my body!
Before I can continue this train of thought I hear a commotion down the hall and security is rushing down the hall. The officers next to me unlatch their guns and rest their hands on the pommels.
Man, I am so busted!
As I look around I realize that everyone has stopped moving. Everyone is just staring into space! What is goin’ on!? Then it’s like someone pressed play and everyone is moving around again.
I see the security and nurses calmly heading back down the hall and then a bright light explodes from a room down the way and comes straight for me! I raise my hands in defense, but it’s too late!
Thanks and have fun!
Part Three – Jeff’s Side of the Situation
Oh, this did not turn out right.
I looked around and wondered if maybe I should have rethought my actions.
I was sitting in a very uncomfortable chair, handcuffed. Yes, handcuffed. A police officer stood on either side of me as I the doctor questioned me. He stops to stare at me and I realize he asked me a question.
“Huh?” Not my brightest moment.
The doctor looks tired and upset. “I asked you if you know why you are still alive? You just suffered a tremendous amount of electricity coursing through your body and the only thing wrong with you is that you gained a massive amount of weight. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the others in the truck lost weight so I think that you might know what happened!”
I shook my head, “Uhm, nope.”
Taking off his glasses the doctor rubs his eyes. “Tell us again how you managed to be in the back of the truck where passengers are not allowed to ride.”
Oops, now they ask the one question that’s going to get me fired. “Uhm, yeah, see…ah man where do I begin?” Shaking my head I plunge in.
“Okay, see, I was supposed to be working back at the warehouse but I helped load the carts into the truck. Sylvia, the one I was helping, joked around and told me to climb into one of the carts. She thought it would be funny to try and scare Josh. Uhm he’s my friend and he was going to drive. Yeah, so I climbed in and after driving for a bit I was supposed to start pounding on the wall and screaming for help. Hehe.” I started smiling and laughing but one look told me no one else thought it was funny. Man, I’m so busted.
“Anyways, I guess they forgot about me or couldn’t hear me because I was banging on the wall for a minute and no one stopped. I tried to get out my phone but dropped it when the truck made a sudden turn. I fell back into the cart and was trying to reach the phone when the whole truck just flipped! The next thing I know I’m getting electricuted and I black out.”
Suddenly the doctors pager goes off and some code is called out over the loudspeaker and the doctor goes running with security right behind him. The officer who had been taking notes tells me to stay put and starts heading in the same direction as the doctor.
Rubbing my hands down my pant leg I start to really pray hard. I stop and look down to find that even though I was sitting straight up with my legs sticking straight out in front of me, my hands were playing with my shoe laces. Quickly, I pull them back and sit with my arms crossed for a bit. Looking around I try to see if anyone else caught that. Nope, doesn’t look like it. Should I try it again?
Trying to act casual about it I stretch my legs and arms only to watch my arms and legs match in length and then continue to grow!
Pulling back I start to think about what is happening to me. First I gain almost 300 pounds in a few hours and now I can stretch my body!
Before I can continue this train of thought I hear a commotion down the hall and security is rushing down the hall. The officers next to me unlatch their guns and rest their hands on the pommels.
Man, I am so busted!
As I look around I realize that everyone has stopped moving. Everyone is just staring into space! What is goin’ on!? Then it’s like someone pressed play and everyone is moving around again.
I see the security and nurses calmly heading back down the hall and then a bright light explodes from a room down the way and comes straight for me! I raise my hands in defense, but it’s too late!
Random Made-up Story Part 2
The following Random Made-up Story series is not finished, but something I wrote to occupy me while making deliveries at my old job. Feel free to comment and critique, just know that they aren't complete and may never be complete. But I do plan on continuing the series at some point.
Thanks and have fun!
Part Two, Joshua picks up the tale.
Three Days Later
In a special 3-person room at Kaiser Fontana, Me, Sylvia, and Sally wake up all at once.
Of course this startles the poor nurses who had just come in to check on us.
Instantly buttons are pushed, doctors are called, and all three of us start firing off questions that the nurses beg us to wait on until the doctors arrive.
It wasn’t long until the doctors and security rushed in.
The first caused relief the second caused worry.
Why was security there?
That answer soon followed.
“Apparently, during the accident a bolt of lightning struck your truck and the three of you received a massive, normally fatal, shock.” The doctor tried smiling to calm us but instead it looked strained. “It boils down to, for some reason you not only escaped death but also any injury at all.”
Sally: “Really?”
Sylvia: “What?”
Me: (after looking down at myself) “That’s so cool!”
The doctor continued, “Of course we have more tests to run, but it looks like something has happened to you. After all you don’t lose that much weight that quickly!” he chuckles but stops when he sees our confused looks. “Uhm, you can take a look for yourselves but none of you look at all like what you did when you were brought in three days ago!”
There was a brief pause before Sylvia and I were tugging at our tubes and cords in order to get out of bed and be the first to the bathroom. Sally was much more calm and smarter than us. She simply lifted the sheet and pulled up her gown.
It was at this point that things took a turn for the weird.
Getting fed up with the tubes, Sylvia yanked them all out as nurses rushed over to prevent her from doing so. She then literally launched herself through the air towards the bathroom, sailing over the heads of even the tall security officer who managed to reach up and grab her ankle.
Quick as a viper, Sylvia flipped mid-air and reached for the officer. Before she could touch him a spark of green fire spit out from her fingertips, causing the officer to let go and recoil uttering a cry of pain!
Just a few feet away Sally was fending off some nurses. “Stop it, I’m not doing anything!” Suddenly she pushed the nurses away. “Let go!”
The nurses were sliding across the floor or just thrown against the far wall!
Sylvia came down, landing on her feet next to the bathroom door staring first at her hands and then at the guard who was holding an arm that looked like it was smoking. Sally scrambled out of bed and heading over to the nurses, apologizing as she went, but she was stopped by more security responding to the commotion rushing in and tackling her.
That’s when I felt something inside of me come welling up and I knew that this had to stop.
“Enough!” I shouted and raised my arms spreading my hands towards everyone in the room.
Instantly everyone but Sylvia and Sally were picked up and slammed into a wall near to them as if by some invisible hands! Sally had to duck to avoid a flying doctor and Sylvia stepped to the side to watch a security guard zip past her towards the wall.
Standing there looking at what just happened and knowing that I had done it I couldn’t move. I was waiting for someone to say something. Sally kept looking at me and Sylvia and then at the orderlies. Finally it was Sylvia who broke the silence. “What the hell?!”
Sally: “What’s happening to us, Josh? Do you know, Sylvia?” She was definitely worried and scared.
Sylvia shrugged. “I don’t know, but I do think I’m likin’ it!” She smiled but she was just as scared as Sally was.
That’s when I realized that I could sense what they were feeling. I also knew we needed to get out of there.
“Clothes. We need our clothes. Maybe if we feel normal we can start figuring this out.” Then the feeling inside was back and I turned wide-eyed to look at Sally and Sylvia. Pointing at them I snapped my fingers and felt the power inside reach out towards them. Before my eyes I watched their hospital gowns slowly stretch and change until we were wearing shoes, socks, jeans, and our navy blue collared work shirts.
“Please.” It was one of the nurses. “Please, don’t hurt us.” She was crying.
“You were trying to hurt us. We just wanted answers.” Though Sally sounded gruff she looked she just got in trouble for something she didn’t do.
“We’re not going to hurt you, in fact,” Sylvia glanced at me, “we’re going to let you down but we really want to go home and think this through. Do you promise to not try and stop us?”
Doctor: “But there are so many questions and tests we need to run in order to find out what happened.”
“No,” Once again the power welled up, “No, we are leaving and you cleared us,” As I spoke I saw them all looking at me. Everyone except Sylvia and Sally were staring at me with a glow rising in their eyes. “We are getting a clean bill of health and the blame for the entire accident will be the debris in the freeway and you are sending a letter to our boss taking us off work for the next three weeks in order to be sure there aren’t any residue effects of the accident, right?”
The light in their eyes blinked out and they were back on the floor standing calmly.
“Well, just let us know if you have any more troubles , but as for now it’s safe for you to head home. I’m sure you’re families are worried.” The doctor smiled and the nurses said their goodbyes. The security had already headed out.
Sylvia: “Thanks, we will let you know.”
Sally: “Bye.”
As the doctor left, the three of us looked at each other.
“We need to talk.” As they nodded I made a grabbing motion with my left hand while my right made a sweeping motion, power surged forward and the room filled with an intense light.
Thanks and have fun!
Part Two, Joshua picks up the tale.
Three Days Later
In a special 3-person room at Kaiser Fontana, Me, Sylvia, and Sally wake up all at once.
Of course this startles the poor nurses who had just come in to check on us.
Instantly buttons are pushed, doctors are called, and all three of us start firing off questions that the nurses beg us to wait on until the doctors arrive.
It wasn’t long until the doctors and security rushed in.
The first caused relief the second caused worry.
Why was security there?
That answer soon followed.
“Apparently, during the accident a bolt of lightning struck your truck and the three of you received a massive, normally fatal, shock.” The doctor tried smiling to calm us but instead it looked strained. “It boils down to, for some reason you not only escaped death but also any injury at all.”
Sally: “Really?”
Sylvia: “What?”
Me: (after looking down at myself) “That’s so cool!”
The doctor continued, “Of course we have more tests to run, but it looks like something has happened to you. After all you don’t lose that much weight that quickly!” he chuckles but stops when he sees our confused looks. “Uhm, you can take a look for yourselves but none of you look at all like what you did when you were brought in three days ago!”
There was a brief pause before Sylvia and I were tugging at our tubes and cords in order to get out of bed and be the first to the bathroom. Sally was much more calm and smarter than us. She simply lifted the sheet and pulled up her gown.
It was at this point that things took a turn for the weird.
Getting fed up with the tubes, Sylvia yanked them all out as nurses rushed over to prevent her from doing so. She then literally launched herself through the air towards the bathroom, sailing over the heads of even the tall security officer who managed to reach up and grab her ankle.
Quick as a viper, Sylvia flipped mid-air and reached for the officer. Before she could touch him a spark of green fire spit out from her fingertips, causing the officer to let go and recoil uttering a cry of pain!
Just a few feet away Sally was fending off some nurses. “Stop it, I’m not doing anything!” Suddenly she pushed the nurses away. “Let go!”
The nurses were sliding across the floor or just thrown against the far wall!
Sylvia came down, landing on her feet next to the bathroom door staring first at her hands and then at the guard who was holding an arm that looked like it was smoking. Sally scrambled out of bed and heading over to the nurses, apologizing as she went, but she was stopped by more security responding to the commotion rushing in and tackling her.
That’s when I felt something inside of me come welling up and I knew that this had to stop.
“Enough!” I shouted and raised my arms spreading my hands towards everyone in the room.
Instantly everyone but Sylvia and Sally were picked up and slammed into a wall near to them as if by some invisible hands! Sally had to duck to avoid a flying doctor and Sylvia stepped to the side to watch a security guard zip past her towards the wall.
Standing there looking at what just happened and knowing that I had done it I couldn’t move. I was waiting for someone to say something. Sally kept looking at me and Sylvia and then at the orderlies. Finally it was Sylvia who broke the silence. “What the hell?!”
Sally: “What’s happening to us, Josh? Do you know, Sylvia?” She was definitely worried and scared.
Sylvia shrugged. “I don’t know, but I do think I’m likin’ it!” She smiled but she was just as scared as Sally was.
That’s when I realized that I could sense what they were feeling. I also knew we needed to get out of there.
“Clothes. We need our clothes. Maybe if we feel normal we can start figuring this out.” Then the feeling inside was back and I turned wide-eyed to look at Sally and Sylvia. Pointing at them I snapped my fingers and felt the power inside reach out towards them. Before my eyes I watched their hospital gowns slowly stretch and change until we were wearing shoes, socks, jeans, and our navy blue collared work shirts.
“Please.” It was one of the nurses. “Please, don’t hurt us.” She was crying.
“You were trying to hurt us. We just wanted answers.” Though Sally sounded gruff she looked she just got in trouble for something she didn’t do.
“We’re not going to hurt you, in fact,” Sylvia glanced at me, “we’re going to let you down but we really want to go home and think this through. Do you promise to not try and stop us?”
Doctor: “But there are so many questions and tests we need to run in order to find out what happened.”
“No,” Once again the power welled up, “No, we are leaving and you cleared us,” As I spoke I saw them all looking at me. Everyone except Sylvia and Sally were staring at me with a glow rising in their eyes. “We are getting a clean bill of health and the blame for the entire accident will be the debris in the freeway and you are sending a letter to our boss taking us off work for the next three weeks in order to be sure there aren’t any residue effects of the accident, right?”
The light in their eyes blinked out and they were back on the floor standing calmly.
“Well, just let us know if you have any more troubles , but as for now it’s safe for you to head home. I’m sure you’re families are worried.” The doctor smiled and the nurses said their goodbyes. The security had already headed out.
Sylvia: “Thanks, we will let you know.”
Sally: “Bye.”
As the doctor left, the three of us looked at each other.
“We need to talk.” As they nodded I made a grabbing motion with my left hand while my right made a sweeping motion, power surged forward and the room filled with an intense light.
Random Made-up Story Part 1
The following Random Made-up Story series is not finished, but something I wrote to occupy me while making deliveries at my old job. Feel free to comment and critique, just know that they aren't complete and may never be complete. But I do plan on continuing the series at some point.
Thanks and have fun!
For years humanity has been slowly sinking into a swamp of evil and uncaring.
Those still faithful to Right continued to pray for deliverance and someone with the power to lead humans back out of the darkness.
One day that prayer was answered.
But will these heroes be aware of their role to play or will they be corrupted by the world and use their powers for their own gain?
That remains to be seen.
In Fontana, Calfornia three warehouse employees left their building and climbed into the truck to make their weekly delivery to the Santa Ana prison inmates.
Every Wednesday these three took the same route to and from Santa Ana. They would drive down, unload the product, hand deliver each bag to the respective inmates, pack up and leave.
Today was no different.
As usual Joshua was driving.
A semi-tall man at 6'1" and very heavy of build, his short-cropped brown and gray hair was already wet from the drizzle of rain coming down.
He wasn't driving because he was the only man of the three of them, but because if he didn’t he would fall asleep and he was embarrassed to think about the girls hearing him snore.
He would give a lot to be able to change things so he wouldn’t have to worry about it.
Sally, who sat next to Josh, was quiet and reserved and usually kept still because she was afraid she would say something silly and be laughed at.
At just about 5'5" tall with long black curly hair and pale skin, Sally was a good listener and had a wonderful smile, but deep inside Sally hoped she could have a more powerful presence and confidence.
The third in this little squad was Sylvia.
Her long red hair and freckled complexion gave passerby's their first clue that her temper was just a short fuse away.
Outspoken and the leader of this team, her outward persona was not able to completely hide her admitted fear of losing her husband again because she believed he thought poorly of her body.
The rain continued to come down as they embarked once again down the freeway.
But none of them saw what was coming toward them.
On the other side of the freeway divider a Corvette was skidding across the slick asphalt!
It hit a used tire that had been left on the shoulder and launched itself over the divider.
Sailing over, the vehicle came down directly under the front fender of the delivery truck causing it to drive up its angled form and into the air falling and sliding along the thin edge of the dividers.
Screaming in terror, despite thinking they would never be so emotional in an event like this, Josh, Sally, and Sylvia tried in vain to brace themselves.
When the truck slid along its side Sally and Sylvia were thrown against Josh, their seatbelts cutting into them.
Just as the truck slowed and began to fall onto the other side of the cement dividers, it slammed its cab into the ground leaving its tail end sticking high in the sky. At just that moment when all three passengers began to pull themselves up, a bolt of lightning struck the metal rear fender of the truck sending thousands of volts of electricity travelling through the body of the truck and into the three trapped inside!
Thanks and have fun!
For years humanity has been slowly sinking into a swamp of evil and uncaring.
Those still faithful to Right continued to pray for deliverance and someone with the power to lead humans back out of the darkness.
One day that prayer was answered.
But will these heroes be aware of their role to play or will they be corrupted by the world and use their powers for their own gain?
That remains to be seen.
In Fontana, Calfornia three warehouse employees left their building and climbed into the truck to make their weekly delivery to the Santa Ana prison inmates.
Every Wednesday these three took the same route to and from Santa Ana. They would drive down, unload the product, hand deliver each bag to the respective inmates, pack up and leave.
Today was no different.
As usual Joshua was driving.
A semi-tall man at 6'1" and very heavy of build, his short-cropped brown and gray hair was already wet from the drizzle of rain coming down.
He wasn't driving because he was the only man of the three of them, but because if he didn’t he would fall asleep and he was embarrassed to think about the girls hearing him snore.
He would give a lot to be able to change things so he wouldn’t have to worry about it.
Sally, who sat next to Josh, was quiet and reserved and usually kept still because she was afraid she would say something silly and be laughed at.
At just about 5'5" tall with long black curly hair and pale skin, Sally was a good listener and had a wonderful smile, but deep inside Sally hoped she could have a more powerful presence and confidence.
The third in this little squad was Sylvia.
Her long red hair and freckled complexion gave passerby's their first clue that her temper was just a short fuse away.
Outspoken and the leader of this team, her outward persona was not able to completely hide her admitted fear of losing her husband again because she believed he thought poorly of her body.
The rain continued to come down as they embarked once again down the freeway.
But none of them saw what was coming toward them.
On the other side of the freeway divider a Corvette was skidding across the slick asphalt!
It hit a used tire that had been left on the shoulder and launched itself over the divider.
Sailing over, the vehicle came down directly under the front fender of the delivery truck causing it to drive up its angled form and into the air falling and sliding along the thin edge of the dividers.
Screaming in terror, despite thinking they would never be so emotional in an event like this, Josh, Sally, and Sylvia tried in vain to brace themselves.
When the truck slid along its side Sally and Sylvia were thrown against Josh, their seatbelts cutting into them.
Just as the truck slowed and began to fall onto the other side of the cement dividers, it slammed its cab into the ground leaving its tail end sticking high in the sky. At just that moment when all three passengers began to pull themselves up, a bolt of lightning struck the metal rear fender of the truck sending thousands of volts of electricity travelling through the body of the truck and into the three trapped inside!
Thursday, August 25, 2011
At 5 o'clock in the morning, I thought, "Why not?"
So I'm sitting here pondering what I can do since I can't sleep, but Keri is.
I can't do any house cleaning cause that would wake her up.
I don't want to go anywhere cause it would be a waste of gas.
Then another childish but fanciful idea popped into my head while reading up on the latest comic-book based movies coming out.
The thought goes like this: "If both Marvel universe and the DC universe were to join together, who, of all the heroes of both universes, would make-up the BEST possible Justice Leage/Avengers, and what would their team name be?"
I've thought of Justice Avengers, League of Avengers, etc. But nothing has really grabbed me.
When it comes to members my first thought goes to the normal tribunal of Superman, Batman, and Wonder Woman.
But are they really the best?
So now I ask you?
For you comic book fans out there, if you were to create a team of superheroes from both universes (using only heroes and no villains) who would you choose to champion the people of Earth?
Ah, but there's a catch!
According to most comics in both universes there needs to be a set number of members with a certain number of reservists.
So here are the numbers that seem to be the most used.
I need a team comprised of twelve(12) permanent team members and five (5) reservists.
That's it. That's all I ask. Comment on here, message me on Facebook, send me an email, or just text me your answers!
Looking forward to seeing what you come up with!
I can't do any house cleaning cause that would wake her up.
I don't want to go anywhere cause it would be a waste of gas.
Then another childish but fanciful idea popped into my head while reading up on the latest comic-book based movies coming out.
The thought goes like this: "If both Marvel universe and the DC universe were to join together, who, of all the heroes of both universes, would make-up the BEST possible Justice Leage/Avengers, and what would their team name be?"
I've thought of Justice Avengers, League of Avengers, etc. But nothing has really grabbed me.
When it comes to members my first thought goes to the normal tribunal of Superman, Batman, and Wonder Woman.
But are they really the best?
So now I ask you?
For you comic book fans out there, if you were to create a team of superheroes from both universes (using only heroes and no villains) who would you choose to champion the people of Earth?
Ah, but there's a catch!
According to most comics in both universes there needs to be a set number of members with a certain number of reservists.
So here are the numbers that seem to be the most used.
I need a team comprised of twelve(12) permanent team members and five (5) reservists.
That's it. That's all I ask. Comment on here, message me on Facebook, send me an email, or just text me your answers!
Looking forward to seeing what you come up with!
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
An idea
Quite often I'm struck with what I believe is inspiration and others believe to be day dreams...childish ones at that.
But that's all semantics.
The truth is they are persistent and if I don't write them down or finish the concept then it nags at me.
One such idea came right after I saw the first Transformers movie.
In the movie, a group of alien highly sophisticated and powerful machines come to Earth and try to blend in by transforming into vehicles. They scan the vehicle and then alter their form to be able to turn into those vehicles. Not a bad concept, but it does have something wrong with it.
The problem I have with this is that the only vehicles they seemed to find were all products of GMC.
Now, grant you, the movie was partially financed by GMC and so they showcased their line of vehicles.
But upon reading the original script, Bumblebee didn't scan a passing Camaro, he downloaded the specs of it after hacking the GMC database.
SO if you were a shapeshifting robot from another world and you came to Earth and could download and change into ANY vehicle that you had the specs to...even if today's earthly technology couldn't make it, as long as you the robot could make it work with your advanced technology...why would you stick to only GMC products?
I went a step farther. Some would say too far.
I made a list of every Autobot in the old cartoon and in comics and then I went through and made a table that would show what they look like in robot form, their original form, if they were in the movies their movie form, and then I showed what I think would be an upgraded form.
I even made them into groups so that some could combine into a larger robot or vehicle.
I also made them part of teams to be spread across the Earth to help humanity maintain law.
In any case, I have finished all of the Autobots and would very much like your opinion of them.
There's a lot so you will be doing a lot of scrolling but hang in there!
Just go to: http://www.tek-tutor.com/downloads/autobots.pdf
Just be sure to leave a comment on here or on Facebook about what you think!
Thanks!
But that's all semantics.
The truth is they are persistent and if I don't write them down or finish the concept then it nags at me.
One such idea came right after I saw the first Transformers movie.
In the movie, a group of alien highly sophisticated and powerful machines come to Earth and try to blend in by transforming into vehicles. They scan the vehicle and then alter their form to be able to turn into those vehicles. Not a bad concept, but it does have something wrong with it.
The problem I have with this is that the only vehicles they seemed to find were all products of GMC.
Now, grant you, the movie was partially financed by GMC and so they showcased their line of vehicles.
But upon reading the original script, Bumblebee didn't scan a passing Camaro, he downloaded the specs of it after hacking the GMC database.
SO if you were a shapeshifting robot from another world and you came to Earth and could download and change into ANY vehicle that you had the specs to...even if today's earthly technology couldn't make it, as long as you the robot could make it work with your advanced technology...why would you stick to only GMC products?
I went a step farther. Some would say too far.
I made a list of every Autobot in the old cartoon and in comics and then I went through and made a table that would show what they look like in robot form, their original form, if they were in the movies their movie form, and then I showed what I think would be an upgraded form.
I even made them into groups so that some could combine into a larger robot or vehicle.
I also made them part of teams to be spread across the Earth to help humanity maintain law.
In any case, I have finished all of the Autobots and would very much like your opinion of them.
There's a lot so you will be doing a lot of scrolling but hang in there!
Just go to: http://www.tek-tutor.com/downloads/autobots.pdf
Just be sure to leave a comment on here or on Facebook about what you think!
Thanks!
Monday, August 22, 2011
Friday, August 19, 2011
The saddest thing I ever had to write...and read.
My Dad – Remembering Him
In all of the TV shows and movies you see that contain a funeral the eulogies by the family sound remarkably the same. I hoped that I might swerve off the beaten path and do something my way, but it feels like I may just fall into that statistic.In thinking of this moment I tried numerous ways to say what I wanted and yet never quite made it through everything.
When I finally got it all down I saw that I had gone past the 90 second rule. Well, get comfortable cause here we go!
What do I say? Dad was Dad. He was the one who swatted me bare-bottomed whenever I misbehaved which means quite a bit of the time.
He was the one who told us that Mr. I Can’t never could do anything. Not even breathe. But Mr. I’ll Try always accomplished things.
Dad taught us how to fish and gut and clean what we caught and he would SEEM to love our disgust at all those insides, but then he would turn up his nose and tell us how disgusting Liver & Onions were to eat!
Dad would sing along with music from Ray Stevens, Les Miserables, Phantom of the Opera, and Joseph & His Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat and then turn to us and say, “I’ve got the same vocal range as…” INSERT NAME OF SINGER. Funny thing is that unless it was a female singer, a lot of times, he was right!
Dad would be the one to tell us that we were to treat people as we would want to be treated, as it says in the Bible, and then we would watch him talking to people after church and realize that he actually did what he taught.
Looking back I remember one summer day that the family was at Camp Cazadero for some ceremony or something and it was time to head home.
Mom, Teddy, and I had come separately from Dad and so I thought I was heading home with them when Dad stepped up and told Mom that I was going home with him and that we will be late in getting back.
Of course my first extinct is to try to recall all of the misdeeds I had performed that day and whether or not his network of spies had seen any of them.
But it turns out I needn’t have worried.
As soon as we both got in the car he turned to me and said, “You’re not in trouble. I just have a few things I think you need to know.”
Whew!
So we drove, for quite a while, until we came to the coastline. There Dad found a turnoff that was on a cliff overlooking the ocean. And there we sat for over an hour as Dad tried to warn me about all that was going to happen to me as I entered junior high and I went through puberty.
Embarrassing…yes, but very truthful and promised myself that I would try to remember at least some of what he was telling me.
But he spoke in a way that sure enough, throughout the next few years, I would remember something else he said in time to make sure I didn’t make too much of a fool of myself.
After the talk though he drove me to Cattlemen’s Restaurant and bought me a steak and lobster dinner. Which surprised me because lobster was (and still is) a big luxury that we RARELY got.
But Dad told me that since I was soon going to be a man that I should not only eat like one but also know what some of the finer things in life were…to eat.
Dad was the one who encouraged my sister Becky into going back to school and when she got cold feet, he wouldn’t relent in his love and encouragement. So she went back and is still going strong with no regrets at University of Louisiana Monroe.
When my sister Kristin took over the music leadership at church Dad supported her and encouraged her even through the tough times. All the way up to and beyond the moment she graduated from Golden Gate Baptist Theological Seminary!
Even my brother passes on things we learned as a child to his children. We were taught that if someone in the family said, “Honor Bright” then that person was not lying. That was unbreakable! Today Teddy and Brook have taught their children the same. RAINBOW BRIGHT! Dad has been passed to another generation.
My Dad had a strength to him that affected everything he did, but when he seemed to be at his lowest he would always power through it and when he made it through he would always give praise to God.
That was Dad.
When cars were wrecked, he would thank God no one was hurt.
When we were in a car accident he would praise God that we didn’t die.
When people would turn on him, or try to take what was his, he would be thankful that God taught him who or what to watch out for next time.
When Dad would be driving long distances to help dying churches turn around he said he and God would talk quite a bit.
It appeared to others that Dad just knew things without having to be told.
And I have to say that I believe one of those moments occurred right in front of me at the hospital 4 weeks ago. Just after the surgeon came in to tell us just how dire things were with Dad and that there was a 50/50 chance of not making it out alive, Mom reached for Dad’s hand.
Dad said, “I’m sorry.” And Mom would say, “just make it through this. I can’t do this without you.” But as she kissed his hand, Dad said once again, “I’m sorry.”
Looking back at that moment…I truly believe Dad knew. He knew he probably wasn’t going to make it.
In a letter to Ms. Pat Henderson who was my Sunday School teacher at Gatetree Chapel, one of the sentences said, "I, too, want to touch the face of God and feel His hands upon my face."
Dad doesn’t hurt anymore. He had touched the face of God and is now getting to meet all those people whose hearts he has touched in his life.
I said it before and I’ll say it again, this one man, not in the media spotlight, touched the lives of so many that he literally had people around the world praying for him. But most importantly they also prayed for God’s Will to be done.
It was. God’s Will was to heal Dad, but this time for all Eternity.
One man affected people around the world all from a hospital bed.
Dad, I believe whole heartedly that you truly deserve and have received the greatest praise Jesus can bestow on us.
“Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy Lord.”
Goodbye Dad, and don’t worry. WE are your legacy and we will not let this torch die.
Quite possibly the funniest email I ever recieved.
If you can read this whole story without tears of laughter running down your cheeks, then there's no hope for you!
*Note: Please take time to read this slowly. If you pay attention to the first two judges, the reaction of the third judge is even better!For those of you who have lived in Texas, you know how true this is. They have a Chili Cook-off about the time the Rodeo comes to town. It takes up a major portion of the parking lot at the Astrodome.
The notes are from an inexperienced chili taster named Frank, who was visiting Texas from the East Coast:
Frank: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. Judge #3 called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking for directions to the Budweiser truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted."
Here are the scorecards from the event:
Chili # 1 (Mike's Maniac Mobster Monster Chili)
Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.
Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
Judge # 3 -- (Frank) Crap, what the heck is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.
Chili # 2 (Arthur's Afterburner Chili)
Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.
Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.
Judge # 3 -- (Frank) Crap, what the heck is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.
Chili # 2 (Arthur's Afterburner Chili)
Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.
Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.
Chili # 3 (Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili)
Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Needs more beans.
Judge # 2 -- A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of peppers.
Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest.
Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Needs more beans.
Judge # 2 -- A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of peppers.
Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest.
Chili # 4 (Bubba's Black Magic)
Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the barmaid, was standing behind me with fresh refills.
Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the barmaid, was standing behind me with fresh refills.
Chili # 5 (Linda's Legal Lip Remover)
Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really hacks me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming.
Chili # 6 (Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety)
Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.
Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.
Judge #3 -- I pooped in my britches when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my butt with a snow cone.
Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.
Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.
Judge #3 -- I pooped in my britches when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my butt with a snow cone.
Chili # 7 (Susan's Screaming Sensation Chili)
Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. I should take note that I am worried about Judge #3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava-like poop to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.
Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. I should take note that I am worried about Judge #3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava-like poop to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.
Chili # 8 (Tommy's Toe-Nail Curling Chili)
Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge # 3 passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor dude, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili.
Judge #3 – (Unable to comment)
My Birthday Quiz
1. On March 1, 1975 Joshua was born at Kaiser Permanente Hospital in Fontana, CA. His Mother was keeping score for a baseball game his Dad was playing in. In order to end the game so he could go see his son being born, Josh’s Dad hit two home runs then sped to the hospital.
What time was Joshua born?
a. Between 8 and 9 pm.
b. Between 9 and 10 pm.
c. Between 10 and 11 pm.
d. Between 11 and Midnight.
2. At the age of eleven (11) Joshua acquired the Chicken Pox and was quarantined at home and not allowed to even participate in his brothers’ birthday party. Later in life Joshua also got pneumonia pretty bad. In fact Joshua has gotten sick a lot more than people think, probably because it never lasts long.
What is the normal length of time Joshua stays sick no matter what he contracts?
a. three(3) days
b. five (5) days
c. one (1) week
d. two (2) weeks
3. When Joshua was thirteen (13) he was struck with a weird growth spurt. Because of this spurt he was in and out of the hospital several times for splints, casts, and other injuries.
What was the growth spurt that caused so much medical drama?
a. Height went from 5’5” to 6’1”
b. Waist went from 30” to 40”
c. Hair length increased until they blocked sight
d. Shoe size increased from size 9 to size 13
4. In Joshua’s Roaring 20’s he journeyed off to live in another state, Montana. After only a year he moved back to California. Because his Dad was a Pastor Joshua was used to moving around.
How many times in his 35 years of life has Joshua moved?
a. 44
b. 33
c. 22
d. 11
5. In grade school at Twin Creeks Elementary Joshua started playing the trumpet and even learned the drum set. Later at Mayfair High School Joshua took on the Tuba, the Baritone, and the French Horn. At Mendocino Community College Joshua even studied the piano and was the only person in class to be able to play equally well with either hand.
At this point in time, how many instruments can Joshua still play?
a. All of them
b. Baritone and Tuba
c. Classical Piano
d. None
6. Joshua loves to read and has been reading full novels since 5th Grade. Back in his Wal-Mart days Joshua would read 100 pages during his hour lunch. Lately work and taking care of the house has limited his reading time.
How fast would it take Joshua to read a book between 400 and 600 pages?
a. three (3) Days
b. five (5) Days
c. one (1) Week
d. nine (9) Days
7. Despite being somewhat large for his age and height Joshua still surprises people with his physical abilities. In fact he has one talent that he is quite proud of that very few people know about.
What physical talent can Joshua perform?
a. a flip
b. a handstand
c. a one armed push-up
d. a cartwheel
8. Joshua and his lovely wife, Keri have three (3) cats. Cyranno de Bergerac, Marilyn Monroe, and Talia.
What is the one ironic twist to the above statement?
a. Joshua prefers dogs
b. Joshua is allergic to cats
c. the cats hate Joshua
d. all of the above
9. When Joshua was younger he used to wish he could change one thing about his body. He wanted to look like Elves and Vulcans.
What part of his body did Joshua wish to change?
a. his eyebrows, he wanted them thinner and arched
b. his jaw, he wanted to be more “chiseled”
c. his ears, he wanted them pointed
d. all of the above
10. Joshua loves music. If he could he would have a musical soundtrack for his life playing as each moment comes.
What type of music does Joshua listen to the most?
a. 80’s music
b. Classical music
c. Christian music
d. Celtic music
BONUS QUESTION:
Joshua keeps claiming to be a “super genius,” despite the fact he has no college degree. But to back up his claim Joshua will tell you that he was tested twice to check his I.Q. level and both times he thought he failed because they wouldn’t accept him in special training.
So, since he’s not quite a “super genius” just how many points is he away from being a “normal” genius?
a. 1
b. 2
c. 3
d. 4
SUPER BONUS QUESTION
At one point in time Joshua had to have all 4 wisdom teeth removed. Then a couple months later he went back again with a unique problem, after all wisdom teeth are not supposed to grow back!
How many wisdom teeth had grown back?
a. 1
b. 2
c. 3
d. 4
My Birthday Calculator says...
1 March 1975
Your date of conception was on or about 8 June 1974 which was a Saturday.You were born on a Saturday
under the astrological sign Pisces.
Your Life path number is 8.
Your fortune cookie reads:
You find beauty in ordinary things, do not lose this ability.
Life Path Compatibility:
You are most compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 2, 4, 8, 11 & 22.
You should get along well with those with the Life Path number 6.
You may or may not get along well with those with the Life Path numbers 1 & 5.
You are least compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 3, 7 & 9.
The Julian calendar date of your birth is 2442472.5.
The golden number for 1975 is 19.
The epact number for 1975 is 17.
The year 1975 was not a leap year.
Your birthday falls into the Chinese year beginning 2/11/1975 and ending 1/30/1976.
You were born in the Chinese year of the Rabbit.
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Your Native American Zodiac sign is Wolf; your plant is Plantain.
You were born in the Egyptian month of Pachons, the first month of the season of Shomu (Harvest).
Your date of birth on the Hebrew calendar is 18 AdarI 5735.
Or if you were born after sundown then the date is 19 AdarI 5735.
The Mayan Calendar long count date of your birthday is 12.18.1.11.8 which is
12 baktun 18 katun 1 tun 11 uinal 8 kin
The Hijra (Islamic Calendar) date of your birth is Saturday, 17 Safar 1395 (1395-2-17).
The date of Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 30 March 1975.
The date of Orthodox Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 4 May 1975.
The date of Ash Wednesday (the first day of Lent) on your birth year was Wednesday 12 February 1975.
The date of Whitsun (Pentecost Sunday) in the year of your birth was Sunday 18 May 1975.
The date of Whisuntide in the year of your birth was Sunday 25 May 1975.
The date of Rosh Hashanah in the year of your birth was Saturday, 6 September 1975.
The date of Passover in the year of your birth was Thursday, 27 March 1975.
The date of Mardi Gras on your birth year was Tuesday 11 February 1975.
As of 8/19/2011 4:46:45 PM EDT
You are 36 years old.
You are 437 months old.
You are 1,903 weeks old.
You are 13,320 days old.
You are 319,696 hours old.
You are 19,181,806 minutes old.
You are 1,150,908,405 seconds old.
Celebrities who share your birthday:
| Jensen Ackles (1978) | Donovan Patton (1977) | Mark-Paul Gosselaar (1974) |
| Booker T (1965) | Russell Wong (1963) | Nik Kershaw (1958) |
| Ron Howard (1954) | Alan Thicke (1947) | Roger Daltrey (1944) |
| Robert Conrad (1935) | Harry Belafonte (1927) | Pete Rozelle (1926) |
| Ralph Ellison (1914) | Harry Caray (1914) | David Niven (1910) |
| Glenn Miller (1904) |
Top songs of 1975
Your age is the equivalent of a dog that is 5.2133072407045 years old. (You're still chasing cats!)
Your lucky day is Thursday.
Your lucky number is 3 & 7.
Your ruling planet(s) is Jupiter & Neptune.
Your lucky dates are 1st, 10th, 19th, 28th.
Your opposition sign is Virgo.
Your opposition number(s) is 5. Today is not one of your lucky days!
There are 195 days till your next birthday
on which your cake will have 37 candles.
Those 37 candles produce 37 BTUs,
or 9,324 calories of heat (that's only 9.3240 food Calories!) .
You can boil 4.23 US ounces of water with that many candles.
In 1975 there were approximately 3.1 million births in the US.
In 1975 the US population was approximately 203,302,031 people, 57.4 persons per square mile.
In 1975 in the US there were approximately 2,152,662 marriages (10.1%) and 1,036,000 divorces (4.9%)
In 1975 in the US there were approximately 1,921,000 deaths (9.5 per 1000)
In the US a new person is born approximately every 8 seconds.
In the US one person dies approximately every 12 seconds.
In 1975 the population of Australia was approximately 13,968,881.
In 1975 there were approximately 233,012 births in Australia.
In 1975 in Australia there were approximately 103,973 marriages and 24,307 divorces.
In 1975 in Australia there were approximately 109,021 deaths.
Your birth flower is DAFFODIL
Your birthstone is Aquamarine
The Mystical properties of Aquamarine
Aquamarine is often used to experience love and mercy. It is said to help ease depression and grief.Some lists consider these stones to be your birthstone. (Birthstone lists come from Jewelers, Tibet, Ayurvedic Indian medicine, and other sources)
Jade, Rock Crystal, Bloodstone
Your birth tree is
Weeping Willow, the Melancholy Beautiful but full of melancholy, attractive, very empathic, loves anything beautiful and tasteful, loves to travel, dreamer, restless, capricious, honest, can be influenced but is not easy to live with, demanding, good intuition, suffers in love but finds sometimes an anchoring partner.
There are 128 days till Christmas 2011!
There are 141 days till Orthodox Christmas!
The moon's phase on the day you were
born was waning gibbous.
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